Shriek Elegance

I want to learn to play the violin. I want to learn how to do it well, too. So, someone buy me a violin? I would love you forever and ever.

I realized today that I lack confidence in my ability to do just about anything. Holy issues much.

If I can finish my POCO write up today (which I will, it’s only 4 pages) and get a start on my Spenser paper, I think I’ll be okay. Especially since she moved the due date to midnight on Tuesday. That means I can work on it more when I get back from work tomorrow and before/after work on Tuesday if need be. I just need to stick to this schedule. No deviating. And lots of dedication. Then I’m done with these godforsaken assignments and all I’ll have left to do is study.

Lee’s birthday today. He mauled me when I came into the kitchen this morning. I couldn’t figure out why he was holding a present. Then I remembered in my morning stupor.

I miss my puppy. D:

Alright. POCO time. Last POCO time. Ever.

[9:01pm]

POCO is almost half done. Yes it has taken this long to get a start on it. Shut up.

I still need to do Spenser.

I am so overwhelmed. Going to be pulling some late nights I guess. If I don’t sign on tomorrow or Tuesday, you know why.

It is so cold in here.

The way Mom has organized the basement is really uncomfortable. I can’t find anywhere comfortable to sit. Bitch bitch moan.

That’s all I guess.

[12:14am]

Well, POCO is done. Just Spenser to go. In all honesty, I don’t know how well I’m going to do on Spenser. For one, the topics suck, two, I still haven’t read the rest of the Faerie Queene because I haven’t had time, and three, I just don’t think I have enough time to write it. Tomorrow will probably be a late night. Thankfully, I don’t work until 3 on Tuesday. -sigh- How troublesome. I’m actually kind of worried about this class. I’m worried about all of my classes. Why am I not smart enough -.-

Whatever. It’s bed time. Bright and shiny morning full of old people wanting stock we probably don’t have tomorrow. Yawn.

For now…

People came over last night. It was hilarious.

Unfortunately, I have lost my favorite ring (the fidget Roman numeral one that I got at PNE). I don’t know where I lost it. It must have been one of the times that I took my gloves off. Which means it was either in Cam’s car or on the bus. It is probably lost forever and it’s actually rather upsetting because I love that ring. :[

I'll write more later.

[8:34pm]

I cannot believe that he would even consider going back on his word like this. How could he even think of doing it? I asked him three years ago. I asked him and he gave me his word. And now he wants to go back on it.

I can’t believe this. Mom is furious with him. I only hope that it’s enough.

I’ve never felt more betrayed in my life.

[12:05am]

Comic relief. Sometimes, when the world is about to end, you just need it.

Also, female appearance jokes make me laugh.

Officially caught up. Back to weekly updates. And back to the real world. D’oh.

Sarika- What does this remind you of? XD I lol’d irl. Oh Bleach.

This is also just as funny as it was the first time.

I would like to thank the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade for this gem. THANK YOU FOR MAKING IT FINALLY HAPPEN IRL.

HAY GUYS. Does the first panel of this sound like anything we say too much?

[11:59pm]

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

Ahhh. I’m such a disappointment.

-shakes head-

Really and truly.

I’m okay with it, kind of, y’know. I wonder why?

It’s just… heh. What are we going to do about this?

Unless I grip the sword,
I cannot protect you.

While gripping the sword,
I cannot embrace you.

[11:08am]

Anyway. I’ve stopped caring about small Japanese quizzes. I really don’t care anymore. I’ve done the homework, all the quizzes, the projects, I show up, and I still have the final. I just can’t care anymore. So I won’t. :)

I’m feeling rather motivated today. I think tomorrow I will work on my POCO seminar write up. And I’m going to make it kick ass to prove to her that I really can write compositions and that my essay was just an isolated disaster. I really can do it. I can. I will not rewrite the essay, though, because the topic was painful and I refuse to revisit it. Anyway, once I get that done, then I just have the Spenser essay and some studying to do.

All of our plays next year for Shakespeare’s Later Works are tragedies. Yesssssss. I love tragedies.

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I want to watch Twilight again. With Sarika. Don’t worry, I won’t (especially not in the theater). But when it comes out on video… I’m thinking it might deserve its very own gathering. Everyone needs to experience what we experienced in that theater. The sheer hilarity.

Danny and I are going to get his hair cut today, hopefully. And then after, I am not doing any homework. Nope. Today, I’m not doing any. I’m going to relax. The whole day. YOU READ CORRECTLY.

Anyway. Counting down the hours until I get to go home. Two hours and fourty-two minutes.

Watch this video all the way until the end. You must watch to the end.

[11:46pm]

I’m feeling pretty useless again. This really needs to stop. So many things zooming around in my head and none of them positive. I just feel like being a shut in and never seeing anyone else ever again. How irritating.

I got something like… I dunno two hours of sleep or something. I made it to bed by 4amish, but I couldn’t fall asleep, yet again. I don’t know. Maybe I was just overtired and that was causing me not to sleep. Anyway. I started out with energy, but it completely disappeared after my first class or two. I was at rock bottom on the bus ride home. Woke up a bit when I got home and all comfy. But I’m back to exhausted. Obviously.

Our seminar went well, I think. There was a fair amount of discussion. And she liked it. Unfortunately, I utterly and completely bombed the essay for that class. But you know what? I don’t even care. I passed it at least. Just. Which means I will pass the class once I submit my write up for the seminar. Which I still have to write.

Submitted my Shaxpur essay an hour ago or something. Wrote the shittiest blog comment ever. Haven’t had any time to study my Kanji, which means I’m going to fail the test tomorrow.

You know, I kind of want to just hang my failure of a self from a tree in the forest somewhere. Probably talking with the help of the lack of sleep, but I really don’t feel like being alive. I don’t really feel all that less stressed. I haven’t been sleeping well at all. I’m miserable. My grades are shitty which is even more depressing because I am trying and the result that I’m seeing just makes me feel like no matter how hard I try, I’m not going to do any better. What is the fucking point.

What is the fucking point.

Sarika and I worked on our seminar until 4 in the morning. That is ridiculous. But we got it done and we think we sound fairly smart. But I am so tired. It was like 4:15 or something by the time I got in bed and then I couldn’t fall asleep until 5 or something. Luckily, it’s autumn/winter so the sun doesn’t come up for a long time. So at least I didn’t have that working against me. Unfortunately, I had a very upsetting dream when I was dozing this morning; I dreamt that the Powerpoint we constructed last night disappeared somehow. It’s a scary thought. I’m almost tempted to back it up right now. Y’know, I think I will.

In other news, my cough is RAGING today. It really sucks.

I wish I could just relax today, after working so hard yesterday. But I can’t. I need to write my Shakespeare essay. And I need to get it pretty much finished today because I need to study for my kanji quiz and listening quiz on Tuesday and Wednesday, respectively.

Anyway. I deserve an hour of farting around before I get started on my essay.

[4:07pm]

I’ve written… half a page (single-spaced out of four). My heart isn’t in it. Every time I try to start writing my introduction, I end up writing something that should go later on in the body. So I move it to the end of what I’ve written. Then I try writing another introduction. Then I do the same thing and move it to the end again. Then I begin the introduction again. Wash, rinse, repeat. I kind of like where my first body point is going. But I am reluctant to actually start talking about Shakespeare. I’d rather rant on about society some more. I found a wicked awesome quote, though. And another article, which is awesome. It means I can ditch one of my other articles that was lame and stupid. I really hope I can make some more progress soon.

Sarika, I miss you already, my Filipino flavor.

[4:52pm]

I love writing essays to this song.

[7:26pm]

I accidentally inhaled a little bit of my own saliva (just a little) when I was brushing my hair after getting out of the shower. Biggest mistake I’ve ever made when I have a cough. I went from standing to down on the floor in less than a second, coughing my brains out. I almost (almost) puked up dinner from coughing so much, but managed to calm down. I crawled over to the toilet, just in case, though. Anyway. I ended up pulling a muscle in my shoulder from coughing. How pathetic is that?

[10:53pm]

I CANNOT STOP COUGHING. My poor torso. /gunheadbang

My essay is not going well. I only have about a page and a quarter. The quality of it isn’t so bad, but the bulk isn’t there. What I’m saying is decent and relevant to my point, but it isn’t taking up enough space. I don’t know what I’m going to do. I’ll stay up as late as I can to work on it and hopefully I can finish it or get most of it done so I can finish it before midnight tomorrow… Merf. Don’t know what to do. And this cough is depressing me. How so very discouraging.

[11:48pm]

I have the stomach pains from Hell. I’m starting to wonder what I did to offend God today. Still not very far on my paper… at about a page and two-thirds-ish. If I can just get two pages done, I will feel a little better about where I am. Time to truck on.

[3:39am]

Just finished my essay. Boo-fucking-yah. Now I’m giong to go to bed. Because I have to wake up in about three hours and I am also giving my seminar with Sarika in… 11ish hours. Oh dear.

G’night.

1. Sarika and I are AWESOME.

2. A spot opened up in Shakespeare’s Later Works! I just happened to check by chance today and there it was! So I have officially switched out of Phonology (sorry Cam :( I really do want to take Phonology, but it’s a second year course and it would be more beneficial for me to take an English; especially an English that is higher level and pre-1800. ILU THOUGH). So! I’m taking two Englishes next term, which means I only have four Englishes to go! I’m so happy!

3. Sarika and I went to see Twilight tonight. I can’t even begin to talk about it. We laughed a lot. Not because the movie was comedic (although it did have some funny comic relief parts) but because it was just so ridiculously sappy that it truly was hilarious. And y’know what? I would probably buy the movie. Why? Because I want to stare at Jasper’s face. Why? BECAUSE “He always looks like he’s in pain all the time.” Seriously. Fucking hilarious. OH YEAH. ONE OTHER THING. Their secret. I don’t even care if you think it’s a “spoiler” (it really isn’t). THEY. SPARKLE. He stood in the sunlight and started SPARKLING. And was like “LOOK AT WHAT I AM!” and I was like, “Uh, what? You look the same. Except maybe a little sweaty,” and then she’s like something along the lines of “YOU’RE LIKE DIAMONDS” and she’s like “You’re beautiful :o” and I’m like “NO HE’S JUST SWEATY BECAUSE HE CARRIED YOU UP A FUCKING MOUNTAIN, GOD. HE’S JUST SWEATY!” But then they went and laid down for a long time and he started sparkling again. Obviously he was not really sweaty. He was just shiny and sparkly. Like a diamond. Or something. OR MAYBE HE HAS A CONDITION WHERE HE SWEATS ALL THE TIME. Oh man he needs some prescription antipersperant or something D:

Anyway. Sarika and I came back to my place to work on our project some more. Yes, we know it is midnight. WE’RE GONNA GIT R DUN THOUGH. Or mostly done. So we can focus on Shakespeare tomorrow.

Yus.

I decided, under Sarah’s influence, to catch up in the Naruto manga again. So I started reading a couple chapters last night, got completely into it again, and read about a year and a half’s worth today. I’m caught up. All I have to say is: Omgwtfhsdfhahjgsfhasdfajskdaafsdugf THAT WAS INTENSE AND A LOT OF THINGS HAPPENED THAT MADE ME SHIT BRICKS AND ALSO MADE ME VERY SAD D: OHHH. MAAAAN. Can’t wait for the next chapter. Can’t waaaaaaait. I am such a loser. Wow. This makes me want to bust out the Bleach manga again so I can catch up there. That will take much more time, though, and will have to wait until after classes are over. I have hundreds of chapters to catch up on there. -sigh-

That’s really all that’s new. Umm. Cam, Charles and I got together yesterday after classes and worked on the script for our oral project until 7ish. Getting home was kind of a fiasco. Then we got together again today to do the filming, with which Danny so graciously helped us<3

Still at Cam’s with Danny just wasting the evening away because we’ve been working so hard. Gracie is currently snuggling my leg. I like it. :3 Gwacieee.

Getting together tomorrow with Sarika to work on our POCO seminar. -sigh- then I have to write my Shakespeare essay on Sunday. Then write my Spenser essay during the week… SIIIIIIIIIIGH. I might go see Twilight tomorrow night with Sarika though for epic lulz. So that will be a nice way to close the day. ‘Cause Sarika is AWESOME<3

Shay and Shane have Intarwebs again! :D

I’m looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow. It’ll be exciting. And restful.

Danny keeps yelling, “No, brown guy!” at Ninja Gaiden. Oh, the language barrier!

Oh yeah, Tyler sniped Chrono Trigger DS from teh Intarwebs. He got the Japanese version, since the North American version isn’t released yet. The Japanese version has both English and Japanese, so it’s all good. Anyway, it required some haxing, but he got it all worked out and passed it over to me. Supa exciting! As a result of this and FF4, I’ve started bringing my DS and PSP to school with me so I can play when I’m on the bus. Strangely enough, I don’t feel sick if I play games and ride the bus at the same time. I get dizzy when I try to read, so this is a nice alternative to music.

“Bahaha, I kick your face.” Oh, Danny.

I’m probably going to have dreams about Naruto tonight since I read so much of it. Awesome. I’m gonna be a ninja in mah dreams tonight. Bet ur jelouse.

New developments?

Trece went crazy again. She found out that her dad and Peggy (her dad’s girlfriend) were coming down to see her from Oklahoma. She wigged out because she, for some reason, thought they were coming down to put her in an institution. So she threw a three hole punch through the front window of the house and then disappeared – without the Jeep or anything. She turned up at her friend’s house later. It has been arranged that now she will be returning to Oklahoma with her dad and Peggy to stay with them, since she has now been considered a danger to herself and cannot be left alone. So she either has to go with them, or actually be sent to an institution. So she has returned to OK with them. Unfortunately, when she left, she took Shane’s Alienware (I would be pissed). But, she had a couple of paycheques come in late (even though she stopped working a while ago) so she gave them to Shane (which was good of her) and Shane was able to build a custom desktop. He couldn’t be without a computer because… he’s in IT. What is an IT person without his computer? Anyway, he got the parts separately for some pretty good prices. In the end, the parts ended up costing him $1000, which ended up becoming an awesome quadcore. Congrats for him. I’m digressing. Anyway, he has moved back into the house with Dante, though he won’t live there for more than a few months because he can’t afford the mortgage payments on his own. Mr. Orr and Peggy, for some reason or another, feel guilty for Trece’s behavior, so they’re offering to pay her half of the utilities so that Shane is able to stay in the house until the next mortgage payment period has passed and the house is taken by the bank. So he has about three months or so in the house. He’s packed up about half the house or so, so he’s ready to take off when need be. Unfortunately, they hadn’t finished deciding who gets what out of the separation before Trece went nuts, so that’s still up in the air. At least I know Shane gets the TV, his PS3 (obviously), the dog, his new computer, and the futon. And I know that all he needs now is a fridge to survive, since he has all of his most valuable toys (and dog). :P

Anyway… to summarize, my soonish-to-be ex-sister-in-law has officially become clinically insane to some unknown degree. My family is fun?

[8:05pm]

I have my job back. Guess what that means? It means Dawn gets money and can pay for her books and tuition next term. AND… I’ll even have some leftover spending money! I can buy my family presents! I’m excited. And, I will admit, it will be nice to go back to work. Getting to see some of my coworkers again will be nice.

Also, I have the 20th booked off for our “secret” Secret of Mana day. :3